During the younger years of life, children are generally attached to their parents or caregivers in everything that they do. This cosy attachment often comes crashing down on the first day of school, in which the child takes their first big step towards independence in the world. It is normal for children to experience feelings of worry, anxiety and upset during this stage of their lives. They may cry and refuse to take part in activities or desperately cling to their parent’s leg while walking through the school gate. These moments can be difficult for parents; however, they are often short-lived. Over time, the child begins to gain the confidence needed to venture out of their comfort zone and begin taking part in school and make new friends. Separation anxiety is perfectly normal in a child’s development and it may have once helped our ancestors to teach their children survival skills.
However, separation anxiety may become problematic if it goes on for much longer than expected at certain stages of development. Some children may experience difficulty in coming to terms with their new-found independence. In these cases, the initial separation worries can last for the first 1-2 years of school. During the school year, 4% of children experience separation anxiety disorder and is most common in children under the age of 12.
There are a number of signs and symptoms of separation anxiety. Physical symptoms are similar to general anxiety, such as racing heart, shortness of breath and dizziness. Additional emotions may bubble to the surface, such as sadness, fear or even embarrassment.
These symptoms can have a knock-on effect in a childs life. They may refuse to go to school or avoid taking part in new activities. The parent may also find that the child needs them to be close at all times. As well as that they lack independence in certain areas of life, such as socialising or sleeping.
Using relaxation techniques can be very beneficial in managing separation anxiety. Simple exercises such as slow and controlled breathing can greatly reduce symptoms of anxiety. These techniques may be used while slowly introducing situations that induce anxiety. Over time, this can help reduce anxiety and more challenging situations can be introduced. It could also be helpful for the child to visualise themselves conquering these challenging situation beforehand.
Check out the following helpful link, which allows you to create an anxiety plan to help your child tackle their separation anxiety.
Written by Shane McSweeney
